Last July, Newsweek published an article called "The John Next Door," recapping the results of a study done by clinical psychologist and researcher Melissa Farley, founder of the non-profit organization Prostitution Research and Education. The actual study 'Comparing Sex Buyers with Men Who Don't Buy Sex: "You can have a good time with the servitude" vs. "You're supporting a system of degradation",' examines whether results of previous prostitution-related research applies to all men or just those who purchase sex.
It's an eye-opening study, and would be worth your time to read the entire Newsweek article, but I'll include some of the main and surprising points here as well.
- In the study, non-sex buyers are defined as those who used pornography no more than once a month and did not frequent a strip-club more than twice a year, along with abstaining from purchasing lap dances, phone sex, escort services, or other services including sex. Sex buyers are those exceeding this definition on any level and can also be dubbed "johns."
- The research found that sex buyers come from all walks of life, including those that are highly respected. From students to cops to pastors to nursing home residents, it seems no station or age is omitted. In fact, the researchers had a difficult time finding subjects who did not in some fashion purchase sex, hence the loose definition for non-sex buyers.
- The majority of men purchasing sexual services from a prostitute are married or partnered.
- Those men who engaged in prostitution and pornography were found to have unrealistic expectations for mutual relationships and to demonstrate greater violence towards and objectification of women.
- Prostitution is the most dangerous "profession," with a life expectancy averaging 34 and a homicide rate 51 times higher than working in a liquor store, which is the second most dangerous workplace.
The actual study shared a list of quotes by the sex buyers and the non-sex buyers which were as revolting as they were hopeful. I picked two to best encompass the general attitudes of each party:
Sex buyer:
"The relationship has to stay superficial because
they are a person and you're capable of getting to
know them. But once you know them, it's a
problem, because you can't objectify them anymore."
Non-sex buyer:
"Prostitution will probably damage your ability to have
long lasting relationships afterward. It might be harder
to bond emotionally - you might get used to objectifying
women."
I was told once that good and evil are like a pendulum that swings at the same level each way. To the degree of one there exists the same opportunity for the other. You could look at this as discouraging, that evil corrupts things meant for good. True. But you could also look at it as this: where evil presides, there is as great a chance for good to overcome it. Yah?
It's easy to read the article mentioned above and get discouraged by the attitudes, statistics, and quotes that reflect the view of so many men out there, but I am impressed by the number of men who have risen up against a sex-driven culture and fought and struggled for what is right when the torrents of society rage the opposite direction. Kudos, guys. Thanks for being real men.
